Not Food

Bugs: Part II – You’re Kidding Me, Right?

This report starts here. No Earthlings eat poop. Or at least no Earthlings advocate eating poop. But some do advocate for the next worse thing. Entomophagy. Discovering that eating bugs … Continue Reading →



Bugs are little nightmares made real. They have to be small because if they were human sized, every Earthling would go insane. (Er.) Most of their worst depictions of us … Continue Reading →


Vomit Clothes

Imagine there’s a tiny creature that vomits up a tiny room so it can change into a tiny, pretty party dress. Then imagine there’s bigger creature that takes that room … Continue Reading →


Churning the Sea of Milk: Part V – Vishnu, the Glory Hog

This report starts here. The penultimate thing to be spat from the Sea of Milk was Kaustubha, the most valuable jewel in the world that’s made of milk. Vishnu grabbed … Continue Reading →


Churning the Sea of Milk: Part IV – The Gifts Keep Coming!

This report starts here. Next up from the Sea of Milk was the moon. Shiva grabbed it. “Shit, yeah. I’m gonna wear it.” And he did. “Like a hat.” Okay. … Continue Reading →


Churning the Sea of Milk: Part III – Cash and Prizes

This report starts here. A thousand years of churning started to pay off in that things began popping out of the milk that you wouldn’t think would pop out  from … Continue Reading →


Churning the Sea of Milk: Part II – It’s a Trap!

This report starts here. To churn the Sea of Milk though, they needed the help of the asuras, who were the enemies of the gods. Demons, essentially. So the gods … Continue Reading →


Churning the Sea of Milk: Part I – Snake Chiropractic

The Hindu gods don’t have a solid command structure. Indra, who’s the king of their gods, pissed off a rishi, who’s just a human. Rishis have mystical powers, so this … Continue Reading →

catch and release

Catch and Release

Fish live in water, not on land. Take them out of the water, they suffocate. Mostly they die though when something eats them; a ugly death by mouth. This could … Continue Reading →


Work: Part II – Speaking of Work

This report starts here. RE: The troubles back home I understand that science establishment back home is questioning the validity of my work. But I’m telling you that all of … Continue Reading →